$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
