Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Barsexuality is the new black.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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