My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
