what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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