Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
