So drunk its hurt
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
