I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize