My friends, they love my intelligence
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
