im gay
i know
yea but for you.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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