That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
