DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
