Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
