I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
