so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
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