somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
