one two three fourrrrnication!
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
