just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
