My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
