Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
