i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He? As in you personified your dick?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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