Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
you win again, gameday.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
