Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
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