now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Who died my cat blue again?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize