you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
