I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
