How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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