I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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