Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
