it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize