thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
