Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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