For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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