Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
