I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
