summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
