mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
