No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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