She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
