Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+44): View more from England

phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...

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(845): View more from New York

Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.

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(951): View more from California

DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness

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(925): View more from California

Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right

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(352): View more from Florida

I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Try sleeping with him.

(402): View more from Nebraska

Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...

(715): View more from Wisconsin

Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.

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