Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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