yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize