FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize