I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Randomize
