I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
