Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
