i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Vodka?
Forever.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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