I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize