why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize