Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize
