...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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